Lessons Learned in Lockdown
If someone had told me at the start of this year that I would be spending many months totally alone, while still living in a big city, I would have said:
#1: I don’t believe it, and
#2: I can’t do it.
Well… I CAN and I am still doing it, (I know many of us are!) and not only am I surviving the experience, I am actually feeling better in many ways, and in other ways…well, I’ll just say that I am learning a lot about myself. Obviously, what is happening in the world right now is tragic and devastating beyond description, but, I am trying to learn what I can from it, and staying positive is a big priority for me , so I will share here some of the things that I have learned in this challenging time, in the hope that something resonates in those who read this. This year has been a very shared experience, and yet it has impacted all of us so uniquely, and I think it is so helpful that we share our distinct stories, perspectives, lessons learned and wisdom gained, because, in the grand scheme of things, we are all in this together.
Firstly, my understanding of the need for Self Care has really deepened, and I sure hope it has for everyone reading this. I am very thankful for the good fortune of having robust mental health, and so all I have had to do is refine & cultivate my self care practice, but my heart goes out to all of those who struggle with mental & emotional well-being even on good days, because this year has been tough, to say the least. Personally, I have been on my own while in ‘lockdown’, and I am somewhat of an extrovert, so my needs are different than an introvert in a full house, with children, possibly managing other health issues, and juggling many hats at once, so I will just speak of my own situation, and what mental & emotional health habits have been really positive for me:
Making plans for the day, the week, & the month: I modify these as needed so I am not creating more stress for myself, but having short, mid- and longterm projects has helped me stay aware of time in a healthy way. Being on my own, it would have been easy to let days morph into nights, and then into weeks, with no sense of my own body clock. Having a routine, a rhythm, and projects to inspire me is keeping me just busy enough so as to not be as bothered by lots of solo time.
Daily Movement Practice: I must thank my teachers for drilling in the habit from childhood onwards of a daily movement routine. Mood swings & motivation always go up & down, even in the best of times, and now it is more extreme. Still, I just don’t listen to the voices in my head that say “Just this once, skip it”. While I honor my need for rest & recovery (more on that in a moment), I let myself be guided by HABIT: it’s not a thought, it’s not another decision to make, there is no debate: I wake up and I move and I don’t regret a single workout. My personal recommendation is to do something first thing in the morning, before there is a chance to talk oneself out of it, or first thing after work, or any regular time that doesn’t require an inner conversation.
Daily Meditation Practice: Personally, I like sitting in stillness for about a half an hour a day. I breathe and let go of my grip on reality, a little bit. I let go of the story of ‘me, my problems, & my worries’, and relax my attention on the breath, and I can feel tension falling off my body by the pound. There are all sorts of wonderful meditative practices, many of them involve simply communing with nature, music, or a pet. This time of being ‘in the present moment’ is like good medicine. We can know in our heads that worrying is not productive or helpful, but that doesn’t stop us from continuing to do it. We can understand intellectually that a situation is not personal, but we can’t stop thinking about ourselves and our own particular circumstances. It’s such a deeply ingrained habit. Meditative time – whether it’s sitting in stillness, or playing the piano, or walking on the beach, is kind of magical, in that is breaks the spell of constant thinking.
Deep friendships: Now more than ever, I am so thankful for those few people with whom I have been able to connect and share more profoundly. Of course, I am thankful for all of my friends, but there are those few with whom I can talk more deeply about ‘life below the surface’, and it has been very uplifting for me. Really I don’t think I can express in words how helpful my good friendships have been.
Good food, good rest, & good smells, aka honouring my animal side: Like many, before all of this I was used to living on minimal sleep, and now that I am getting the recommended amount, I will never go back! Instead of my body ‘working’ to try to stay alert all day, I now feel relaxed and awake at the same time, with no effort! Certainly being active during the day really helps with getting good rest at night. Also, being in house basically all the time means more home cooking, which has been fantastic. The struggle to stay creative with food is minor in comparison to the benefits of healthy, home-cooked deliciousness. I call all of this ‘honouring my animal side’ because I realise that the simple practices, like scheduling my own mani/pedi nights with good music and aromatherapy, really make me smile, which is also good medicine.
Less online time: This has actually been a little bit hard because my main connection with the outer world is virtual, and many social media groups have actually been quite helpful for me. Still, I can feel when my brain has had enough of the news of the day (which is often negative and draining), and I pick up my book instead, or phone a friend, or get some extra sleep! We all know online time is not good medicine, and again, it’s just creating the habit of unplugging sooner and more often.
Creating healthy habits is not the easiest thing in the world to do, as some may have discovered. I have to start with small, manageable steps, otherwise they don’t stick. I also have to make any new habit enjoyable – so I look for creative ways to do so. Forcing healthy habits has never worked for me, rather, I find it helpful to see myself as a child that needs some guidance from the more ‘adult’ side of me. It delights me that, at almost 50 years old, I am still able to learn how to take better care of this creature I call ‘me’, and I really do hope that, during this crisis, everyone has discovered something about how to take care of their ‘me’ also. When we feel good, we have more positive energy to give.
This has all really influenced my desire to teach online. Being in lockdown has allowed me to understand the importance of putting effort into developing and maintaining my health in all ways (physical, mental, emotional) and into cultivating healthy relationships. I thought about people who are unable to make it to ‘in person’ classes - due to an injury or chronic condition, who are unable to drive or navigate stairs, who have small children that need care, or whose work or travel schedule make it difficult to find a neighbourhood fitness community, as just a few examples. The vast majority of my teaching career has been ‘in person’, like most movement teachers, and I have always understood the value of the social aspect of classes was well as the exercise component. I’m so pleased to have discovered that teaching online, 1 to 1, is also very social. I am able to connect very personally with my students, which is great. Our world is changing, but knowing that we can still connect in a genuine way, and that we can still look out for each other, really warms my heart.
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